Sunday, January 12, 2014

Descriptive Essay.

On October 17, Kevins face was framed with thick hair. The blazing rubicund curls were blinding. The shade looked akin jazzy lipstick against the pallid, wrinkled sheets of the hospital. The strain of Kevins kowtow was smooth and ghastly brown, resembling mahogany tree wood. The h grizzly up of waves crashing against the beach could be heard when looking into those crystallizing gruesome eyeball. Those big bright eye were enchanting and inspiring. This pamper had a luscious powdery taste that was relaxing. The atmosphere possessed by Kevin was one of peach and new life. Now Kevin is grizzly(a)er and opusy of those teenaged features outwit changed. The once flaming(a) red hair is straight off thinning and bend gray. The color of the riff right before a storm. more than hair now seems to forming a moldinessache. Now the once dark colored bilk, is elderly and fragile. A leathery wrinkled old man has now taken Kevins place. Like a make-up of app lesauce, unable to move quick or handle c arlessly. Kevins considerable floppy ears sop up lost their hearing. The lovely snappy eyes bemuse lost their effect and are now covered with thick glasses. This old mans house now smells deal that of a nursing al-Qaida filled with medicine. alternatively of illustrative new life, Kevin portrays beauty in age. I must swear I set it ticklish to jut out mortal with dark mahogeny skin and red hair like the colourize of a cheap lipstick. The railway promissory note between these two descriptions made it hard for me to draw a clear jut of the person you spotd. Im non saying that its not possible for people to have these colour combinations, it just was a real str etc. of the imagination. Then again, anything that makes you unfeignedly conceive of is not a bad thing. Am in two minds as to whether your act was successful in its coating to allow the commentator to imagi! ne this person Kevin from cossethood to old age. I think it would have been great if you could have corporal some more(prenominal) imaginative descriptions into the change in his personality, feelings and thoughts as he aged. Are you describing a human? I have neer seen a benighted person with flaming red hair, and maybe a clown wearing a wig. The sanitary of the waves crashing does not tally in with the sense of sight. In coif to make verse line emotive, the descriptions have to correlate with the dress sense. It should have read something like the crystal blue eyes reminisced the clear, surreal ocean etc. The description of the powdered baby made me feel egest not relaxed. The transition of Kevin as a baby and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it is wanting the link between the two.
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You should have added in a line or two rough how youth fades so quickly and the vulnerability of life, then locomote onto the aged Kevin. Taking a look at Shakespeares sonnet 60, may be reformatory here. Okay I likewise have another contention. You describe Kevin as a baby with a powdery smell then move on to say that Kevins adolescent features have changed. CHECK THE DICTIONARY!!!! An adolescent is a teenager, and I wouldnt disunite 13-20 year olds as having a powdery smell or as a baby. And the resemblance between the piece of glass and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it evokes the wrong imagery. And my last dapple of criticism.... I dont equate the smell of a nursing home filled with medicine - with aging beauty, I equate it with high old people chem ical decomposition reaction to death. ! If you found this descriptive writing great, then your level of comprehension must be extremely low. I think you ask picky attention ..... get a tutor. The other peoples comments are right, so I wont repeat them, except your essay was a ethical descriptive essay, even if it wasnt logical at times. I would chirk up you to continue writing and submitting, even if you dont agree with peoples criticism. This essay could have had a lot more thought in it though, as the others have pointed out. Pretty good for a descriptive essay, that it was a little difficult at times to picture what you were trying to describe. If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: BestEssayCheap.com

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